Camila is one and Im entering my 3RD TRIMESTER!

3rd trimester?! Already?

This pregnancy is FLYING by, but its going SO SLOW. The bigger I get the slower it goes! So many things are the same about this pregnancy as my last - Im carrying the same, I overall feel the same, don't really have many cravings or crazy hormones, for the most part I have a decent amount of energy, my back hurts and small things like doing the dishes and sleeping are annoying.

Theres a few things that are definitely different though. For one I am growing so much faster! I was still sleeping on my stomach (pillow propped, but still) until like 30some weeks with C. Can't even entertain that thought now.
Here's me at 27 weeks with Camila:

Dang! Comparing those pics makes me fully understand why Ive been feeling so large and lazy…BECAUSE I'M LARGE AND LAZY. Ha. I don't even want to know what 39 weeks will look like this time around. Knocking on wood I don't develop stretch marks and that I go early ( I went at 39 weeks with C)!

Also, this little dude can KICK. He likes to just jab elbows and knees into uncomfortable places that make me wince. And he really enjoys the bladder-position. Enter the stereo-type of always having to pee…its happening. Camila wasn't like that - she would stretch and roll but that was about it. I keep hearing its a boy thing.  ;)

Anyhow, Im definitely feeling MUCH more lethargic this time around. I think part of this is completely my fault - I haven't been working out anywhere near the intensity I was with pregnancy 1. Many of you probably think thats a good thing but Im telling you, its not! The less effort I put in to working out the worse I feel. I feel lethargic and lack energy, and my body creaks and moans much more. When Im keeping active and pushing myself to break a sweat, I definitely feel it for the rest of the day, but doing that consistently helps me feel well oiled and more energetic. Now that we are back from our many vacations (blog about traveling with a toddler is a must!) I am trying to get back into a workout routine to keep me sane! If anyone's interested, Ive been using a workout program created by my high school friend Nancy. She works for a company called Pear Sports and helped to develop prenatal workouts that are delivered through an app for your iPhone. I love these workouts for a few reasons.

 1) Its Nancy coaching, so its kind of funny slash weird to 'hang out' with her a few times a week. 

2) Its on my iPhone so no matter where I am I can use it, and the only equipment needed are some dumbbells or a stroller (for the interval runs - stroller only needed if you have baby in tow :)  ).

 3) These are NOT what you think of when you think of "prenatal workouts". When I think prenatal workout, I think stretching, light, slow movements, no bouncing, etc. In sum, LAME (not to judge- if you are new to working out this is a great start at being physically active). These workouts are legit - I told my husband he should just do them with me. Im talking running with high intensity plyo intervals, burpees, squats, deadlifts, pushups…the only thing making these "prenatal" is the lack of pull-ups and crunches, which are the only exercises  that have a logical reason NOT to be included in prenatal workouts. And the fact that she throws in little tidbits about how good exercising is for you and baby and how each exercise can directly assist in labor and delivery. Other than, imagine a high intensity 30-minute workout - thats what these are. 

MOVING ON, Camila is ONE!!!!!!!!!

I used to be one of those people that didn't understand why it was such a big deal when your kid turned one. I mean, they're still babies. They don't GET it. Why throw them a party? They won't even remember it! 

I totally get it now. Not only do you not care if they remember it - they will love it NOW and so seeing that smile is all that matters - you are kind of celebrating yourselves as parents also. Our friend Amanda got it perfectly. When she and her husband and daughter arrived at our party here in MD, she handed ME flowers and said "Happy anniversary - its been one year since you guys brought her into this world." I was like, girl, YES. Thats EXACTLY how I've been feeling. It's OUR celebration as much as it is hers. Its been one year since our hearts and souls changed forever. Since we truly discovered what love is. One year of no longer caring about anything else as much as seeing your precious baby smile. One year of watching her sleep, crying when she cried, hearing her giggle and feeling like our hearts would explode, watching her discover the cause and effect of her own actions, examining poop and laughing at how that now defined our life, bringing her into bed at 3am because she just wanted to be with us, discovering her outgoing personality and trying to figure out exactly who she looks like. Its amazing and hard and exhausting and exhilarating and we never could have predicted how insanely in love we would be with her, and with being parents. Best thing we've ever done, hands down. And damn do we make a solid team.  :)

In El Paso our family threw an amazing first birthday party - my mother in law and sisters-in-law did so much to make it special for her:

And we had another smaller party here in MD when we returned - my mom and stepdad hosted and close family came in from out of town, making it extra special:

And then I took fun pictures to top off the great memories: 

Its crazy to think that this time next year we will be celebrating Camila turning two, and preparing for the little dude's first birthday party. Time, man. You know. 

Birthday and mother's day reflections - SAP WARNING!

As I am sitting here at 6am watching I Love Lucy reruns (my favorite show of all time), on my birthday, sipping a hot cup of coffee (the 2nd cup, because I spilled the entire first cup on myself and the couch…that sucked), I am reflecting on being 30, being a mother, and what its like to be married to the man I was made for and to have built a life and a family with him.

Yes yes, sap sap, I know. I considered not writing a blog about this, because its really just personal thoughts and reflections, but I remembered that part of the purpose of this blog is for memory's sake.

I was feeling a little bummed about not being in my 20s anymore. This is the first time Ive ever felt unexcited about a birthday! Its an oddly adult feeling. However a friend told me something yesterday that really hit home. She said she loves her thirties, because once she was entering her 30s, she had already explored and discovered herself and what she loves in life. So she feels like she is able to spend her 30s really enjoying who she is and what she enjoys, rather than the whole "finding yourself" we all do in our 20s. I really like that perspective, and I totally agree! I plan on spending the next decade getting as much out of life as possible.



A few days before my 30th birthday, I got to celebrate my first and only first Mother's Day. What is Mother's Day anyway? Just another greeting card holiday, like Valentine's Day, which I refuse to celebrate. It was interesting because this year, like every year, I started stressing about what to get my mom and stepmom for Mother's Day. All of a sudden I put it into perspective - what will I want from Camila when she's older? What will I expect? The truth - Absolutely nothing. The only thing I would want from her is to spend the day with her, or if she's not living close enough to do that, for her to call me and spend an hour on the phone with me catching me up on the latest and greatest in her life. The only thing I care about on Mother's Day is knowing my children are happy, knowing they are leading fulfilling and happy lives, and having them carve out some time to love on their mom, who loves them more than they will ever know. The last thing I would want is for her to stress about the obligatory gift or flowers.

So I chose to completely forgo gifts and flowers for my mothers (sorry guys!) on the basis that I know now that they feel the same way I do. Instead we hand-made a card for each and spent the day with them.

Before I go in to my Mother's Day memories, I have to say that being a mother is the most incredible, rewarding, amazing, awesome experience in the WORLD. This little girl has changed me more than I thought possible. My heart quadrupled in size the moment I laid eyes on her. It also decided to plant itself OUTSIDE of my body, where it can no longer hide emotions and feelings. I could just stare at her all day. My days spent at home with her are too short and too fast. I kiss her at least once a minute. Even her toes, and I hate feet. I am so grateful and so blessed that my husband and I have built a life where I don't have to miss a single smile, tear, new discovery or excited squeal. This baby girl has my heart wrapped around her finger and that both warms me and scares me in ways only a parent can understand. I remember the week I went into labor with her, where I became so petrified of being a parent, of having to focus on someone else other than myself and my husband, of having my life change, that I broke down in tears. And how that feeling completely disappeared once they placed her in my arms. I look back on that fear now and laugh, because it seems so foolish.
Ok, tears are present…moving on.

We started the day with Camila sleeping later than us (score!) and Donovan and Camila making us a
delicious, special breakfast. After nap time we went on a bike ride, stopping at Dunkin Donuts and the park on the way back. It was a perfect near-90-degree day (the heat and I are friends), so our treat was iced coffee, and since Camila is so used to being able to eat and drink whatever we are eating and drinking, she needed a treat too. So we got her two donut holes…and oh my gosh, I wish I had video taped her reaction when we gave her BOTH at the same time. We have some pretty great pictures…but they don't capture her excitement nearly as well. She was thrilled to have one, but as soon as Donovan placed the other in her hand, she pulled them both close to her, tilted her head back and just started giggling.


We didn't get a picture of that first reaction, but it was this face:

…but in this moment:

She didn't even eat them right away. She sat there admiring her treasure, giggling, pretending to feed us then pulling them back in, pretending to put them back in the cup but never letting her iron grip go, until finally we brought her hands to her mouth and she ate both within minutes. It was pretty damn adorable.

That whole morning pretty much made my day. Just spending it with my little family, sharing special moments and enjoying the sunshine.

We then went to my dad and step-moms for a get together, and then to my mom and stepdad's for dinner. At my dad's, there was a tub of water balloons that Camila was obsessed with! Oh my gosh watching her play with those balloons was SO flipping adorable! She was absolutely delighted for a good 30-45 minutes.

Donovan was telling me to squeeze the balloon, and you can tell by my face that I was the one that knew what was going to happen! 

And there it is!

At my mom's, we just spent time relaxing, eating and playing corn hole. Camila really enjoyed just watching us play, and rolling around in the grass.  :)

We also got some fabulous Mother's Day photos  :)

Happy heart. I am feeling incredibly blessed, not only to be a mother to the most amazing little person I have ever met in my life, or to be the wife of the most caring, loving and loyal man and father I've ever met, but to have a mom who loves me more than life, the way I love Camila, and who absolutely adores her granddaughter. A step-mom who has accepted me as her own daughter, and loves her granddaughter in the same way. And a mother-in-law who raised that previously-mentioned caring, loving and loyal man and who has accepted me in to her family with love and acceptance. What more do you need?!